…the parched land shall become a pool, and the thirsty lands springs of water…(Isaiah 35:7)

To Hope and Quietly Wait

By Rex Goode

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All three kingdoms in immortality are called “kingdoms of glory” and to listen to the descriptions of them, even the lower two seem appealing. I recall many years ago attending a fireside where a speaker in an informal setting did a seminar that was a spiritualization of goal setting. Not having ever been adept at a sales mentality, I was feeling a bit put out at this idea.

We were all asked to write down some goals, beginning with eternal goals and continuing down in granularity to the next few minutes. Among the twenty-some people there, under the category of eternal goals, everyone wrote a variation of “to obtain the celestial kingdom”–everyone but me. My goal was much less ambitious. I wanted to love the Lord, love others, be obedient, and repent when necessary. The presenter tritely asked if anyone had written anything but the favored answer. After a quick mental debate with myself, I raised my hand. After I read my goals, it was clear that I had not performed as hoped and no one understood my reasoning. Some even seemed to think I had been slightly irreverent, suggesting that my grasp of the gospel was lacking. While it may have been true that I was not the gospel scholar that many of them were, since I had only recently returned to church activity after abandoning homosexuality, I don’t think I was that far off.

Since that time I have discovered that not everyone operates on a desire to be in the celestial kingdom. I have met people who are unwilling or consider themselves unable to abide a celestial law. One such person even claimed a testimony of the gospel, but chose to remove himself from membership in the church, thus in his mind, consciously choosing a telestial or terrestrial glory.

This is but one of the problems I see that comes from a reward-oriented view of spirituality. I have heard this complaint before about our theology–that our beliefs foster a focus on getting paid for goodness, thus diminishing or nullifying the value of grace. Anyone thus complaining would have had their opinion confirmed at the fireside I attended.

I sympathize and understand the decision some have made to accept a lesser reward rather than spend a difficult and painful life struggling against homosexuality. I think in that sense, many of us have at least faced the possibility that this particular struggle is more trying than we believe ourselves capable of winning. I do believe that I am not able to overcome this particular challenge, and that to set a goal to have purged it from my life completely will set me up for heartbreaking disappointment. The Lord is able, but I am not. I firmly believe and hope that in his own time and in his own way he will overcome it in me.

Consequently, I have no such personal goal, preferring to fall back on my original goal which is to love the Lord, love others, obey, and repent. As I continue to work toward that goal, I have plenty of evidence that the Lord has accepted this approach from me. This evidence comes in the form of love, grace, and blessings. With all the bad, the good in life has been more powerful, overwhelming the low points with a rich abundance of joy.

So numerous have been my blessings that I almost feel as if I’ve already been rewarded beyond what I have deserved. As an example: How could anything I have done have merited me a wife who loves me as much as Barbara does, especially when I have been so ill-equipped to effectively grant her needs? In this light, setting a goal that presupposes a particular reward feels presumptuous. I have already been repaid and more for anything good I may have done.

I am not saying that I should not be celestial-minded. I just prefer to think of being driven more by hope than by goals. Regardless of the system of rewards, I would find it difficult to act in any other consistent manner than one that I hope demonstrates my love and gratitude to the Lord Jesus Christ. Note that I said “consistent manner,” recognizing that I seem to have no problems playing the ingrate on occasion. It is my awe of his mercy and grace that pulls me back in the right direction at those times. This is why I don’t see myself making any deliberate decisions to settle for a lower kingdom.

My heretofore unstated goal is to arrive at the the judgement bar without a list of accomplishments to read. The scriptures tell us that the Lord “employeth no servant” there.

Jacob taught that…

…the keeper of the gate is the Holy One of Israel; and he employeth no servant there… — 2 Nephi 9:41

I find it impossible to picture any great deed that I may have done that would not pale into obscurity and insignificance in comparison to the ultimate expression of love and mercy that is the atonement. In his magnificent presence I would hope that no feelings of pride would manifest in me.

And he put forth a parable to those which were bidden rooms; saying unto them.

When thou are bidden of any man to a wedding, sit not down in the highest room; lest a more honorable man than thou be bidden of him;

And he that bade thee and him come and say to thee, Give this man place; and thou begin with shame to take the lowest room.

But when thou art bidden, go and sit down in the lowest room; that when he that bade thee cometh, he may say unto thee, Friend, go up higher: then shalt thou have worship in the presence of them that sit at meat with thee.

For whosoever exalteth himself shall be abased, but he that humbleth himself shall be exalted. — Luke 14:7–11

To anyone who has decided that they are unable to achieve celestial glory, I wish to say that I understand. I do not know but that I may not achieve it either. I hope that I will. I plead with you to hope the same for yourselves.

It is good that a man should both hope and quietly wait for the salvation of the Lord. — Lamentations 3:26

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